Today was my last day in the corporate world and tomorrow will be my first day as a stay-at-home-mom. Those of you who know me best are probably chuckling at the very thought. After all, I would have laughed harder than anyone if you suggested to me a few years ago that I would ever want to watch Mickey Mouse Clubhouse all day.
But I don’t want to talk about being a SAHM.
I want to talk about this guy:
That’s my husband, Randy. And he’s the reason (with the Lord’s help) of why I was able to quit my job.
The second I found out I was pregnant, he began working SO hard to provide a way for us to live on one income. We were both so convinced that he was going to move up in management at a popular grocery chain here in Atlanta that we were really disappointed when it didn’t happen quickly (though we both felt that it was the Lord’s will for him to be there). Well they say everything is 20/20 in hindsight, so of course now we see that if he had never started working at the grocery store, he would have never met the guy who recommend him for the current job he has—which is owning a bread delivery route in Marietta.
Randy wakes up around 2am almost every day of the week and puts in hours of hard work before most of us hit snooze for the first time. He has been putting in 12-hour (and sometimes 14- or 15-hour) days from the get-go and he never complains. Even when he only gets 5 or 6 hours of sleep a night. Or when he gets home from a long day, and 10 minutes after he walks in the door his phone goes off and he has to go back out again to make a delivery.
His only complaint is that he doesn’t get to spend as much time with Sarah and me as he would like. He’s that kind of guy.
And I’m a lucky girl.
I talk to Sarah all the time about how hard her dad works for us, and even send her emails (to the account I set up for her) that she can read one day. I want her to know that after her dad walked in the door last week from a 15 hour day, all he wanted to do was hold her (even though I knew he was starving and dinner was on the table). When she’s a teenager and full of attitude, I want her to open that email and see the picture I took of her dad holding her with his dirty and calloused hands, and see that he’s still grinning from ear to ear even though he’s clearly dead on his feet.
And even though we’re stepping out on faith and stepping into uncharted territory, Randy and I know that this is what is best for our family. Even when money is tight. Even if, after some time has passed, and I feel like I’m not “contributing.” And especially when I doubt.
God tells us in Pslams 37:4 “Delight yourself in the Lord, and he will give you the desires of your heart.”
I never thought that the desire of my heart would be to stay home with my baby, or to be a homemaker who takes care of my husband and home. But I realized something. God put that desire there, and he is the one who fulfilled it.